so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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