She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
