There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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