I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
he shaved USA in his pubs
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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