Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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