Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
