you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
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