the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
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