She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I just found puke in my bra..
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
