I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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