it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight lets celebrate not being married
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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