I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
