Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
