is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
