You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize