On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
