you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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