i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize