I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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