He kissed a someone with a penis
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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