I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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