the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
