dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
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