I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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