Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
