my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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