she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Randomize