nut hugger
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
