At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
