HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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