question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize