oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
