New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
