I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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