Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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