Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
