haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
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