After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
People With No Siblings Will Never Understand These 23 Things
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
25 Seemingly Normal Things That Give Some People Massive Anxiety
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.