If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.