it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
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