at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
