I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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