So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
