happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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