dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
