I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
