he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Randomize
