the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
And the cops told us we were all naked.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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