If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
