we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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