Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
