Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
