I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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